how often do you make love

How often should a couple have sex?

Do you have sex twice a week or twice a month? And does it matter to your relationship how often you make love? 

how often do you make love
Most people feel sex is important …
  • Work stops many of us having sex as regularly as we would like.
  • Family life – such as babies and children get in the way of love making.
  • And some couples are unable to tell one another what they would really like in bed.

Most of us have no idea how our sex lives really compare to other couples. But a new survey has revealed that one in three couples (32%) in a long term relationship or marriage have sex so infrequently now that they can’t remember the last time they had it, with one in ten (10%) even admitting to no longer having a sexual relationship at all.

The study by The Fantasy Box also shows that 61% of those surveyed admit to enjoying a better sex life in previous relationships, with over a third of couples (38%) aged 25-44 blaming family life getting in the way, and nearly half (49%) putting it down to not having the confidence to communicate regularly about their sexual fantasies desires.

For younger couples aged 18-25, work life priorities were cited as the most common reason (19%), and for the grey generation aged 55 plus, not feeling as fit as healthy as they once affected half (50%) of respondents.

Over a third (39%) also admitted to hiding their sexual fantasies from their current partner, stating also (38%) that they just don’t talk about sex anymore. Over a quarter also confessed to being scared of their partners’ reaction (27%) and suffering from a lack of confidence in the bedroom department (27%).

For those couples citing sex as the number one “elephant in the room” in their relationship, nearly a quarter (24%) felt there was not enough information on products and services out there out there to support affected relationships. Half of these of these respondents (50%) suggested they would consider trying dedicated date nights, with nearly one in five (18%) admitting to wanting to experiment more with sex toys to spice things up.

Mariah Byrne, the co-founder of The Fantasy Box said: “This research shows just how much our sex lives are suffering, and how much of an impact it’s having on the happiness of even the most committed relationships. But it’s not that we don’t want it, we just don’t talk about what we really want!

“Our research showed that whilst a quarter (25%) of the UK have read 50 Shades of Grey, (raising to over a third for those couples aged 18-34) many more of us are too afraid to share our own fantasies with our partners or even talk about sex at all. It appears we’re happy to read about it, but when it comes to our own relationships, we take the stiff upper lip approach and become rather reserved!

“As a woman, I founded The Fantasy Box with my partner Chris with one mission – to bring back our happy sex lives! We believe that a happy sex life is one of the, if not the, most important elements in a happy long term relationship. And it all starts with talking to your partner, sharing what you really want, getting over the fear of rejection or embarrassment. And then doing it! So we started a subscription service that will not only help you take your intimacy to the next level, but also rediscover your relationship, inside the bedroom and out. Our aim is make monogamy the sexiest thing on the planet!”

TOP 10 FANCY DRESS FANTASIES

1. Doctor & Nurse
2. French Maid
3. Schoolgirl
4. Secretary
5. Playgirl Bunny
6. Air Hostess
7. Firefighter
8. Masseuse
9. Victoria’s Secret Angel
10. Policeman

The Fantasy Box launched in the UK on 13th-15th November at Sexpo, and aims to help partners discover what they like, both individually, and as a couple, through communication and discovery. For more information on the revolutionary date night tool, please visit www.thefantasybox.com.

Are you in a marriage where as a couple you rarely if ever have sex – or maybe you are the opposite and have sex at least once a day. If you and your partner or spouse would be happy to take part in an honest article about how often a real couple has sex, do contact me.

Alison Smith-Squire

Alison Smith-Squire is a writer, journalist and media agent selling exclusive real life stories to newspapers, magazines and TV. She owns the sell my story website Featureworld.co.uk, which was set up to help ordinary people sell their stories to the press.

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